This is how I felt for years. I unconsciously made that feeling visible. Only after painting, I recognised it. That feeling of being totally alien in a naive representation of a safe nourishing world. Crying without a voice. Only then I became aware of it.
Like this cartoon fish finding himself in the wrong story. Wrong place, wrong orientation, wrong direction. Anguish, panic and no voice to utter the sheer terror…
Underneath this I now suspect my deep unmet need to be seen and received in this world. The painting dates 1997, so two decades ago. Only now I become aware of many of my unconscious motives. I want to belong. I need to take my proper place.
making things visible 